Monday, May 15, 2017


life is too short for anything mediocre.

in a month i turn thirty-one.  now, i am of the belief that age is just a number, and you're only as young or old as you feel, and i feel ever-so-young, but it still stops me in my tracks that i've lived through three decades already.

every year as i reflect on my life i think, man, i've really learned a lot this year.  only to find i still have a lot to learn.  maybe it's that i see every setback, every broken heart, every scary situation, as an opportunity to grow.  or maybe i was a real asshole in another life, and i'm still paying for it.  haha, could go either way i guess?

in all seriousness, i think i've finally experienced enough to grasp the concept that life really is too short.  i've shortchanged myself always, for as long as i can remember, and i've lost out on a lot of really great moments because of it.  but i can't do that anymore.  this was the year that i learned to find balance.  and it's brought me to a great place in my work life, as well.  there's something to be said about enjoying your work, and putting your head down to move up and move forward can be so rewarding.

i can say, in all honesty, that at the end of the day i can look myself in the mirror and i feel no regret, no shame, no distaste at my own reflection.  i'm genuinely content with where i'm at in my journey, and the plans i've made for my future, and the path i've chosen to my own happiness.  the important thing to remember is my happiness is my happiness, so therefore, my path is my path.  no one else's.  i am one-in-seven billion (as we all are), so how could i ever compare myself to anyone else?

matthew mcconaughey said that he looks up to the man he'll be in 10 years, but he'll never actually reach that man, because the man he'll be in 10 years will always be his hero.  so at 15, his hero was him at 25, and at 25, his hero was him at 35, and so on and so on.  i get that.  i feel the same way.  the person i look up to, is me in 5 years.  because i know how hard i am going to have to work between now and then to become that person.  and 5 years from now, i'll have a new dream, and a new hero.

in the meantime, i'll be taking a lot of deep breaths, keeping my demons at bay, and trying to surround myself with positivity, because i've seen how other people's negativity can drag me down.  i don't want to be a miserable, cynical version of myself - i want to always be proud of and appreciate the person i see in the mirror.  sometimes that means letting things go, and trusting that the universe will take care of you, if you take care of yourself.

as always, i remind you - you only get one life, babes.  live it.

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