excerpts from a book i'll never write - seven.

he said, "i have issues."

ain't that cute?

"i have issues."  that's why i can't stay faithful.  that's why i'm a compulsive liar.  that's why i broke your heart.  that's why i was not meant for you.

as if "issues" were an excuse, a catch-all apology for his misbehavior, his willingness to do harm to the women who loved him.  or love him.  or loved not really him, but the person he portrayed himself to be.

"i'm sorry you feel that way."

his apology when you told him what a rat he is.  what a disgrace to mankind, to men everywhere who are faithful, who fight to be seen as gentlemen in this age of social media and easy access to greener grass.

not, "i'm sorry that i couldn't be faithful to you, or to her, or to whichever of you was actually my girlfriend."  not, "i'm sorry that i lied, i'm sorry i did these things that resulted in you feeling this way."

no.  just, "i'm sorry you feel that way."

as if you could feel any other way about the things he did.

and here's where you learn to trust your gut.  to hear the bullshit between the lines.  here's where the epiphany happens.

he was never the man you fell in love with.  that man doesn't exist.  he's a fairy tale.  the boy who broke your heart was a wolf in sheep's clothing.  a charade.  a masked narcissistic, sociopath.  someone who can never be honest, can never be trusted, can never be in your life.  because you deserve better.

and it will come, baby girl.  one day it will come.