rambling.

i hate that feeling of all those thoughts and emotions just flying through my mind, but i can't put them to paper.  i can't get the words out.  and i'm lying here at one am with all these thoughts and no rest.

writer's block.  it's hell.

most days i don't know how i feel.  i'm so mixed up in my head.  people are disappointing.  i always want to fix things i can't control.

i'll never understand why i feel so lost.  i was hand led to a road i traveled alone and when i got to the destination i didn't know where to go next.  i followed the next path laid out for me and ended up with a broken heart and not much else.  no closer to knowing my life's purpose.

i want to be who i am and all the girls others want me to be too.  i want to be sarcasm and smiles.  i want to be a lady and an imp. 

you know what i'm scared of?  never finding myself.  feeling lost forever.  dead end after dead end.