Saturday, October 12, 2013

it's friday!!!

given the way that i've felt all week, i didn't want to write about something sad.  but apparently i can't help myself.  i didn't watch last night's episode of glee, because a) i'm not caught up yet, and b) i just don't think i'm ready.  see, i still feel like i'm mourning.  not cory monteith (though he was pretty amazing as finn and incredibly talented), but love.  i'm mourning love.  or the loss of it.  i feel for lea.  on some level, i feel as though i understand what she is going through.  drugs hurt people.  not just the doers, but the people who desperately love the doers, too.  and this performance of hers just guts me.  you can see that her emotion is real, and her pain is deep.

i feel like one of the messages of last night's music selection on glee, was that we should choose life.  we should appreciate our lives.  we should focus on living and loving.  i can't help but think that i wasn't really living before i left him.  and now, i've had an amazing year, and so many great memories, and they were ones that i chose to experience for myself.

so to keep on with living my life and building a legacy i can be proud of, i'm going to spend this weekend embracing the opportunities that come my way (unlike last sunday).  there will be studying and learning about things that matter to me, football games, and time spent with my family, friends, and those adorable, little, cheer girls of mine.  i hope one day that embracing life comes naturally to me, but i can be ok with working on it for now.  i no longer want to focus on what i don't have anymore, and think only of the adventures i've yet to embark upon.

happy weekend, y'all.  go forth and conquer!

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