pain.

ever just wake up in the morning and feel like rolling out of bed is going to kill you?  ever sit at your desk in the middle of the day and think to yourself, "i gotta get out of here, i gotta get out of here, i gotta get out of here..."?  that's how i feel today.  how i felt yesterday.  and i how i assume i'm going to feel tomorrow.  lately, i can't help but count down the days until i'm out of new orleans.  it's all i think about.  ernest and i moving back home, and never looking back.  i'm sure there are some things i'll miss.  i love history and architecture and this is a beautiful city.  but i won't miss my job.  i won't miss any of the people.  and i really just want this to be a part of my past already.

i keep thinking of how i can make it better.  but i feel like i'm stuck.  i don't plan on being here much longer, just until the end of the summer, so looking for another job seems pointless.  i can't just quit, because we can't afford our apartment solely off of ernest's income.  but i'm losing my soul here.  that's what it feels like.  and i no longer feel comfortable with how management handles things, with what i'm asked to do.  how do other people in my position cope?